On Being Precious
Much has been said about Gabourey Sidibe’s weight. Being one of the heaviest women in Hollywood in a place to blatantly encourages thinness at all costs, it’s no surprise.
But Gabourey has maintained her positivity in the face of naysayers. And she has consistently kept her focus on her talent and positivity, not her weight.
While she lost the Best Actress award to Sandra Bullock, today we celebrate somebody in the media spotlight who is non-traditionally radiant and throws a wrench in what we consider “beautiful.”
That’s positive news!
“I used to get hurt so badly. Any bit of criticism, I would cry. But at some point I just realized, I count more than anyone else, or anybody’s opinion, because I’m living my life — I’m captain of this ship, without a first mate. And I really, really like who I am. I really, really dig me.”
- Gabourey Sidibe
I’m always encouraged by brave women! Yes it takes bravery just to be ourselves when we don’t fit into the thin sliver of what is deemed “acceptable” in this country and in Hollywood in particular. Thank you Gabourey Sidibe for learning to accept yourself, even in the midst of those who would have you to hate yourself. BLACK PEOPLE…take a lesson!
black-folks.blogspot.com
There is a very large, forgive the pun, difference between healthy active women of normal weight and this poor woman who is morbidly obese facing a limited life and limited lifespan and I don’t think we should celebrate what is essentially slow suicide. She does not need to be a size 4 to be beautiful but she needs to be considerably leaner to be healthy and I think, truly happy.
In Hollywood, Susan, many women fall in the dangerously underweight range, which most of us aren’t nearly as bothered by. That’s become commonplace, accepted and in many cases, encouraged. That kind of role modeling has done FAR more damage to the self-image of women and young girls then someone like Sidibe.
I don’t think Sidibe considers herself a “poor” woman at all. She’s not concerned what you think about her weight and she seems pretty darn happy. I wonder what size she needs to be before she’s truly happy? I didn’t know happiness was weighed by the pound.
Bottom line: her body is none of our business. She’s an actor who just blew everyone away by a fantastic performance. And she breaks the traditional mold of being perfectly pretty - something that seems like a societal slow suicide to us all.
She will without a doubt be facing a shorter lifespan than the average person just as a woman who starves herself to death will. Neither should be occuring in our society - no one should stuff and no one should starve oneself.
Would you cheer on someone who smoked 2 packs a day because they accepted themselves. How about a crack addict. Hollywood does as long as they are producing and right now she’s producing money for everyone and all the little skinny people can praise her and make themselves look like stellar human beings. Of course they maintain those bodies with just diet and exercise.
I see no difference between turning a blind eye to emaciated actresses posing on the red carpet (the elephant in the room being how they got to that size) and ignoring the very real health consquences she will be facing as she get’s older. We have lost the idea of what a normal healthy body looks like and it’s it’s not Gabourey Sidibe or, for example, Victoria Beckham and I can’t help but think that you don’t get Gabourey Sidibe without Victoria Beckham. I do note that Victoria never has to come out and say that she is happy - she sure doesn’t look it and I can’t imagine that she get’s full joy out of life in her physical condition as well.
I’m glad she is happy - she could take that wonderful happiness out for a long walk and get started towards a longer life.
As for people who drink and do drugs and smoke cigarettes in Hollywood, that list is endless. I wouldn’t know where to begin.
I cheer Sidibe on, first and foremost, because she did a magnificent job acting and she’s not a mainstream actor. I cheer her on because someone who didn’t look like a supermodel was cast in a lead role in a very reputable film, breaking us free, just a little, from a restrictive, perfect female stereotype that’s killing us all. And yes, I cheer her on because she seems happy with herself.
Underneath it all, Susan, I don’t believe you’re concerned about her health, or you’d be writing comments all over the place about Victoria Beckham or Lindsay Lohan or a million other starving actresses. Your concerns - as others - mask a certain disgust for her weight - one you don’t feel as profoundly about when someone is underweight or smoking cigarettes. She gets more societal shame and wrath blanketed in “concern.”
Is being overweight unhealthy? Hell, yeah. It just shouldn’t be stigmatized any further than that. Women have enough shame heaped on them. And its especially worse when its done by other women.
So I celebrate the fact that Sidibe is slammed on a daily basis for people’s “concern” for her weight and still manages to smile, in the face of it all.
And don’t worry - undoubtedly Hollywood will do a number on Sidibe and we’ll applaud wildly, while watching Oprah (whose yo-yo weight is much more dangerous. Should be concerned for her as well), when Sidibe walks out on the stage and has lost 150 pounds. “Now she’s more acceptable and pretty! Yay.” Meanwhile, she’ll become a Brittany Murphy, desperate to attain some ideal she’s never found within herself.
Susan, on some levels, I agree with you. Nobody should turn a blind eye toward any life-threatening weight issue. But we do. We routinely turn a blind eye toward starving women. Every day of our lives. You will today. Overweight women incur shame and secret scrorn…and that’s what I have a problem with.